What you should (and shouldn’t) ask your Bridesmaids to do

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What you should (and shouldn’t) ask your Bridesmaids to do

What you should (and shouldn’t) ask your Bridesmaids to do

You’ve said ‘Yes’, the ring is on your finger and now you’re ready to start planning the big day. It’s time to choose which of your beloved friends and family you want by your side to share in all of the excitement!

Whilst asking friends or family members to be your bridesmaids is an honour, it can also be a big ask of their time and money.

Here are a few things you should and shouldn’t ask your bridesmaids to do once they’ve accepted their all-important role…


Ask them to plan the hen party
From bringing fun ideas to the table to inviting guests, organising transport, accommodation and catering, these are all bridesmaid duties when it comes to planning your Hen Party. They should know what you enjoy so if you had a relaxing spa weekend in mind but you’re presented with a night of hedonistic clubbing, ask them to change their plans to something more suitable.

Help to choose their bridesmaid dresses
You are completely in your own right to choose bridesmaids’ dresses without consulting them first but choosing a style and colour that suits a few different shapes and skin tones isn’t necessarily going to end up with agreement first time around! Ask your troupe to get together to try on a few different styles until all are agreed. This will give you peace of mind that everyone will be happy and comfortable on the big day.

Bellissima Brides

Pay for their hair, makeup and accessories
Wedding planning costs can quickly add up. You may be planning on buying your bridesmaids’ dresses but it’s not uncommon to request that they pay for their own along with their hair and makeup and accessories.

Lady Muck Wedding Services

Look after you on the day
Ask your bridesmaids to be close by and on-hand throughout the day to help you get ready, fix your dress and veil pre-ceremony, hand you a tissue or a glass of champagne. You can also ask them to help get the party started… no one likes to be first on the dance floor! Happy bridesmaids will make your day extra special!

The Toni James Band


Expect them to take on the role of a ‘supplier’
Even if you’re on a budget don’t ask your bridesmaid to bake the cake, design the initiations or order of service, decorate the venue or make a bouquet of flowers! Professional suppliers are there for a reason….

Pink Sherbert Designs

Cake Shop Liverpool

Get involved in personal or family fall-outs
With so much to plan and so many decisions to be made, not everyone is always going to agree with each other when it comes to planning a wedding. If this sparks a fall out with family, don’t ask your bridesmaids to step in or take sides. This will only cause them to feel uncomfortable on the day and beyond.

Change their appearance
Expecting your bridesmaids to wear similar makeup, hair styles, nail varnish and dresses is to be expected and an acceptable request… to a point! Singling out any of your bridesmaids and asking them to shed or put on a couple of pounds, change the colour of their hair or force a spray tan upon them is not.

Expect them to be at every single pre-wedding appointment
Depending on the size and style of your big day, a wedding can take months, even up to a year to plan. This will involve a lot of appointments, meetings and days out. Don’t forget that your bridesmaids have work and family responsibilities too and won’t always be indispensable to your planning needs.

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